September 18, 2011

Passing down the faults

There are some things about my kids that I hate, absolutely hate.

When they do these things it puts me in this horrible frame of mind.  I just want to punch the living daylights out of them.

One of them is when they throw a temper tantrum and lose total patience and start being unacceptably rude to others, just because things are not going their way.


You know what the biggest problem about all of that is?  If I am perfectly honest?  And with you all I must be.  They get that from me.

I don't know if it's innate, or if I taught this totally unacceptable behaviour to them, Maybe it's a bit of both.  But it's ugly and thoroughly unpleasant to live with.


It's the whole violence, in actions and in words that is barely leashed.  The swearing and bitching and insults flung about.  Throwing things here and there.  Smashing things.

I have worked very very hard at controlling it in the last few years.  It's not pretty and I have to stop subjecting those around me to it.  However, it pisses me completely off when I see my kids do it, and they do, some more often than others.

Can someone tell me why I have such a hard time accepting the faults in my kids that are my own?  Why do I expect them to be so much better than me?

Thanks for reading!

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